9-28-2020

 9-28-2020. Exactly 3 years ago, I underwent surgery...and my life was never the same again.

As a DCIS patient, I am on HRT since December 2020 and will take the same meds for about 2 more years. I am also regularly seeing an oncologist to make sure my Stage 0 condition won't progress to the next...kaya pasensya na po sa mga umuutang, mahal po ang follow up ultrasound, mammogram and lab tests ko. 😔

I will be forever grateful to my former employer, InLife, for taking care of me...as you can see from the hospital billing on the photo, I paid 0.00 when I got out...I was admitted Sept 27 and was discharged Sept 29, na wala ni piso akong binayad sa MCM. InLife covered everything. Maraming salamat, InLife. And to my surgeon na sobrang bait, more than two years na follow up check ups, hindi niya ako siningil ng consultation fee ever! God bless you, Doc Kat.

To ladies out there, early detection is still the best protection. 

1. Don't take APEs and med results/doctor recommendations for granted. 

2. If you are postponing surgical procedures or any medical ek ek, kasi feeling mo mahirap isingit sa trabaho, don't. If you have the means, the resources, the support, unahin mo ang health (with emphasis on the means, resources - kasi baka ma-offend yung iba, sabihin porke ikaw nareimburse mo). 

3. You cannot do your job well kung may health problem or concerns ka. Araw-araw, may iniisip ka, may iniinda ka. Pano mo haharapin ang projects mo nang maayos? Hindi masama ang self-care.

4. I later on learned from my psychiatrist that this chapter of my life was one of the causes of my MDD/ depression. Sino ba ang hindi maaapektuhan o hindi mababaliw habang iniintay mo kung may cancer ka o ano. She also thought hindi ako nabigyan ng ample time to recover from the surgery. After 2 weeks na sick leave kasi, pumasok na ko. She felt it wasn't just right.

5. Pag nareremind tayo ng mortality natin, we start to focus on what matters, kung ano or sino ang importante sa buhay natin. Morbid? Scary? Yes, totally. Minu-minuto, lagi ko Siya nireremind na wag muna ko kunin, kasi kailangan pa ko ng mga anak ko. 😭😭😭

Life goes on...and the Lord is watching over us. Kahit minsan, hindi natin deserved. (You may read my past blogs https://therealgoodgirl.blogspot.com/2020/10/breast-wishes-part-1.html

https://therealgoodgirl.blogspot.com/2020/10/breast-wishes-part-2.html

https://therealgoodgirl.blogspot.com/2020/10/bre9ast-wishes-part-3.html

https://therealgoodgirl.blogspot.com/2020/12/breast-wishes-part-4.html)

May the Lord continue to bless us all. 

#talesofthegoodgirl

#LayoVer Review

 #LayoVer Review ⭐️

He’s got the V

Taehyung's vocals and visuals...

His voice is like a hug

A rest, a respite, a nap

That you're waiting for after a stressful or bad day

Comforting you until all troubles are gone

Like a shield

Protecting you from the storm and thunder

Like a light 

In your darkest moment

A refreshing mist on a scorching hour

Listening to him is

Like coming home to the one you love.

And you don't mind the waiting...

So V-eautiful...

---

Track listing

1. Rainy Days

2. Blue

3. Love Me Again

4. Slow Dancing – my favorite

5. For Us

6. Slow Dancing (Piano Version)

The album (which I bought as a birthday present for myself) is designed like a box or package delivered with "lots of love" featuring his beloved Pomeranian YeonTan. I got all three versions – purple, blue and green plus the Weverse digital album. You can listen to it over and over again in one sitting and fall in love forever, it is so V as we all know he is a jazz and R&B fan. As with the other member’s solo albums, Layover showcases V’s own individual personality, taste and sound. His voice is deep, husky, dreamy and soulful. The songs are warm, romantic and nostalgic – just like him. And if we will take it literally, Layover as a short rest, we can’t wait for his next step or destination. 

#LoveMeAgain #RainyDays #SlowDancing #Blue #ForUs

#Layover #VSoloAlbum #BTSV #KimTaehyung #BTS #ARMY #BuhayKPam

Fan(Girl) Zone (My K-World)

Yung napapanuod  mo lang sila sa streaming apps, or sa movies na talagang first day showing ang hinahabol mo. Naiinlove ka sa acting (o sige na nga, sa kagwapuhan). Tapos ma-meet mo sila and ma-witness mo up close and personal yung sincerity nila, yung desire to make fans happy and fulfilled. Paglabas pa lang nila sa stage, tutulo ang luha mo. Promise. Sobrang sulit (kahit nauna nang maiyak ang wallet mo). Kahit minamadali kayo ng staff sa Goodbye Session, ang nagiging goal mo kasi is to comply sa strict rules nila, at hindi yung nakafocus ka sa pagHi at pag-Bye LOL

As I’ve posted, #OKTAECYEONinMNL2023 #SpecialTY is my happiest and luckiest and most fun and most fulfilling fan meet (although 5^th FM ko pa lang naman). Yung ilang araw na nakalipas, nakangiti ka pa rin and chinecheck mo lahat ng related posts – X, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok. At lalo mo silang minamahal. Kahit mahal silang mahalin LOL Yung isang ticket na 8k-10k, pang one-week grocery mo na.

Born and bred fangirl ako and I am not embarrassed to admit it. In fact, sobrang tinolerate ako ng tatay ko mula bata pa ko. My late father would always accompany me – sa paghanap ng bahay ni Francis Magalona sa Mandaluyong, sa pagbabad sa ULTRA and sa radio program ni Romy Kintanar nung araw to see my favorite basketball players/RP Team, sa pag-attend ng concerts naming magkakapatid (New Kids on the Block, Fra Lippo Lippi, Keno, Bon Jovi, Gloria Estefan, among others). Yung mga trip ko nun, sinasakyan ng Papa ko. It didn’t matter kung hatid-sundo ang peg, maghihintay sya or sila ni Mama sa parking or somewhere or babalik na lang silai. Basta sasamahan nya ako / kami.

One thing I have learned (and accepted) though, kahit na super super fan ka, marerealize mo (and may makikilala ka) na mas super super super fan than you are. Kala mo #1 fan ka? Hindi rin LOL “There's always somebody out there crazier than you.” And hindi mo sya masisisi.

• ·       January 22, 2023 – Kim Seon Ho, Mall of Asia Arena
• ·       April 16, 2023 – Lee Jong Suk, PICC Plenary Hall
• ·       June 16-18, 2023 – Team Labas, AgustD D-Day Tour, Singapore Indoor Stadium
• ·       July 2, 2023 – Cha Eun Woo, Smart Araneta
• ·       August 6, 2023 – Jung Hae In, New Frontier Theater
• ·       September 23, 2023 – Ok Taec Yeon, New Frontier Theater
• ·       October 1, 2023 – Twice, Philippine Arena
• ·       Next??? Sana masundan pa ng marami, Lord
• ·       Bye Park Seo Joon, Ahn Hyo Seop, Lee Jun Ho for now
• ·       Choi Woo Shik (11/16) - may katiting na pag-asa pa
• ·       Park Hyung Sik (TBA) - sayo na nakataya budget ko

#BuhayKPam

 

 

The Uncanny Counter Seasons 1 & 2 signing off

"You know, hope is a cruel monster. But that's what drives us to keep fighting.”

Alam ninyo yung naghahanap kayo ng mapapanuod sa Netflix, scroll scroll tapos may laging lumalabas sa feed mo, pero hindi mo pinapansin. You look at the synopsis, parang hindi mo type. Lalo na kung gusto mo lang ng light, yung rom-com, hindi ka stressed sa kontrabida, and above all, may Oppa. 

Ganyan ang love affair ko with #TheUncannyCounter. “Demon hunters pose as workers in a noodle shop in an effort to catch evil spirits hoping to find eternal life.” Yan ang description kung ano ang Counters. 

Naku, parang ma-stress yata ako dito, I thought before. Sa zombies nga, napapagod ako eh hehehe kahit eto ung mga gusto kong panuorin minsan – suspense, mystery, action-thriller, supernatural, yan ganyan. Maiba lang ba. Gusto ko rin yung walang Papa-ble na lead, para hindi na nadadagdagan mga Oppa ko, utang na loob LOL 

I actually got curious with #Season2CounterPunch kasi trending yung mga villains/kontrabida. Yung mabait na si #KangKiYoung sa #ExtraordinaryAttorneyWoo (as grrrrrr #HwangPilGwang) eh dito talagang isusumpa mo ang kasamaan) and #TheGlory’s #KimHieora as grrrrrr #GelliChoi na gusto mong ipakagat sa gabundok na langgam sa pagka-salbahe. Season 2 already ended and lumabas na nga ang bullying scandal ni Hieora.

Sabi ko, naku, paano ba ito, dalawang seasons ang kailangang bunuin, syempre you have to watch Season 1 first. Sige habulin natin. Kahit na sabay-sabay na pinapanuod ko (#Moving #BehindYourTouch #DestinedWithYou #ATimeCalledYou). 

And I didn’t expect na maiinlove ako sa series na ito. Kahit wala akong favorite sa mga leads. Pag na-hook ako despite that, wala na, surrender na ko. Although si Ms. Chu (played by the very versatile #YumHyeRan of #TheGlory #MaskGirl, pwedeng mabait na ahjumma, pwedeng kontrabida), eh given na yan. At kung may award for the cast / ensemble, bigyan ko sila for chemistry.

Season 1 

#JoByeongKyu as #SoMun (#HotStoveLeague, 1st time ko sya mapanuod)

#YuJunSang as #GaMoTak (#AlchemyofSouls, ang abs ni ahjussi ha!)

#KimSeJeong as #DoHaNa (#BusinessProposal)

#AhnSukHwan as #ChoiJangMul (#RooftopPrince)

#LeeHongNae as #JiCheongShin (#DrRomantic, ang abs din ha! Infer)

Season 2

#YooInSoo as #NaJeokBong (siya yung hate natin sa #AllOfUsAreDead)

#JinSeonKyu as #MaJuSeok (#ConfidentialAssignment2International, hanapin nyo rin sya sa #KingTheLand and #Vincenzo)

As the series dealt with life, death and afterlife, may mga buhos-luha scenes talaga, hindi mo mapigilan. Sabi nga ni Mun, there is a thin line between life and death. “I know how it feels to lose your family in the blink of an eye. They’re here one moment. And then all of a sudden, they disappear.” Tama ba yung recall ko hehe basta parang ganun. Reminds you that life is short, na dapat you cherish every moment with your loved ones, sabihan mo sila na mahal mo sila. 

May mga “Huh” and “Hmp” moments, may dragging scenes lalo na sa Season 2, you just have to suspend your disbelief, ika nga to enjoy watching hehehe Buti na lang din hindi na nila inistretch and ginawang 12 eps lang.

And as a birthday gift to myself, I bought a cherry red track jacket like theirs. Love it!

#TheUncannyCounter streams in #Netflix, habol na!

#BuhayKPam

A Tale of Two Writers

While we were in Starbucks this afternoon, and as Alex and Caehl were sitting comfortably preparing to read, I commented on their book purchases.

“Aba, dalawa pala ang books na binili ni Daddy.”

Then Caehl said, “I’m not much into fiction.”

Me: What? What do you mean? You don’t prefer fiction, you don’t like reading fiction?

Caehl: No. Parang hindi (ina-accept) ng brain ko.

I just laughed. I didn’t know how to process that. “Grabe ka naman.”

Why, he asked.

Me: Because your dad and I are fictionists.

Me: Didn’t you know that your dad is the UST Rector’s Literary Award winner in 1992? And didn’t you know that I published my first fiction when I was 17, and I got paid for that?

Come to think of it, yes, Caehl isn’t much into fiction. He has always been a no-nonsense, serious reader. I know we tried to introduce him to some teen / young adult literature but he is really into reference books. His collection is composed mostly of dictionaries, encyclopedias, almanacs, and atlases. And I realized after that conversation that yes, fiction was my life then. I was a short story writer. And his dad, too.

Alex is the better writer between the two of us, there’s no contest and I acknowledge that (well, in fact UST did). While I got paid for my published works in local women’s magazines when we were in college, he won literary awards for his short fiction and poetry. And he was one of the favorites of the late Dean Ophelia A. Dimalanta (one of the country's most respected writers).

I told him, “Nakakamiss din magsulat ng fiction, no? Kaya ko pa kaya?”

Why not, he said. Bakit hindi mo gawin? Mas marami ka ngang time ngayon.

I don’t know if I still can. When I was still working, puro memos, project proposals, presentations na lang ang alam ko. Now naman, puro blogs na lang sinusulat ko. I mean, as in real-life, honest-to-goodness everyday experiences, moments and adventures. Hindi ko alam kung kaya ko pa gumawa ng fiction. Dati nun, nagreresearch pa ako sa settings ko.

Wow, napapailing na lang ako. Yan nga pala ang past life ko. I cannot remember now how many short stories of mine were published (maybe more than 10?), and some poetry. Magazines may be a thing of the past now, but it was a big deal back then. Imagine my thrill as a seventeener when I received a checque way back 1988. I just graduated from high school then, trying to make my summer memorable before entering college. As I didn’t have a bank account, I had to go to the branch in Binondo to encash it, and the other checques that followed nung nasa UST na ko. My parents were so proud of me. Lalo na ang Papa ko na kasama ko palagi sa bank. In fact, I had a compilation of my short stories, two volumes yun, type-written na naka-bind (Jimmy Doe and Other Stories, Volume 1 and Volume 2). But sadly, I lost them, I don’t know how. Maybe it was after we moved back to my parent’s house in Laguna after 4 years in QC. Tapos binabaha pa bahay namin nun.

I also dreamed of writing a novel. I remember seeing myself in a beach house na nagsusulat kahit matanda na ko. 

I still can dream, can’t I?

Note: The Gawad Ustetika Rector's Literary Award is given to a literary work that best reflects the “University’s Catholic vision of grace and redemption.” 

Visit therealgoodgirl.blogspot.com

#talesofthegoodgirl | May 21, 2023

 

 

 

#AgustD #DDay

Unexpected flaws piled up in layers create the afterimages of my multiple selves.

Not getting intimidated but rebelling and raising questions against contradictions of countless conditions the world demands.

---D-Day

#AgustD, how could you? How could your album mean so much?

If Jimin’s #FACE could make a person appreciate his weaknesses and vulnerabilities more, #Suga or AgustD’s #DDay will break your heart but will leave you fearless (that is, if you aren’t yet).

It was truly a perfect timing that I got to watch his Disney+ documentary #RoadToD-DAY first before getting to see his #AMYGDALA MV. The docu is all about his “journey to find new stories and inspire new dreams” as he creates his solo album. And it will make you understand and appreciate him more.

What do you think are the chances of a totally controllable future arriving?

There’s a high chance that the future you dreaded never happens.

This is the story I wanted to share with you.

People always worry about the uncertainty of the future. They fear it.

And they’re distressed over the past that they can’t change.

But the only thing you can control is the present.

I want to share stories that focus on the present.

The past is the past. The present is the present. The future is the future.

Put too much meaning into them and they will torment you.

It’s up to the listeners to judge my work, and only time will tell…

“I don’t know your name…” His painful memories - of his parents’ health, of his accident and injury, his mental health issues, his struggles. I now understand why he seems the most serious among the seven members of #BTS (in fact, his gummy smile is one in a million). And I didn’t realize how soothing and comforting his singing voice could be. No wonder, he is a top bias-wrecker.

#AMYGDALA brought tears to my eyes as I too recall my dark days when I myself was having depression and I didn’t know it yet that time. Darkness would envelop me, I didn’t know what was happening. And if you weren’t too mindful or if you won’t be able to figure out what was going on, it will make you do things that are not right. And coming out of it alive now, fear becomes just a word. Nothing will scare you anymore.

“Depression causes the hippocampus to raise its cortisol levels, impeding the development of neurons in your brain. The shrinkage of brain circuits is closely connected to the reduction of the affected part's function. While other cerebral areas shrink due to high levels of cortisol, the amygdala enlarges. The amygdala controls emotion, so this may cause issues like sleep disturbances, mood swings, and other hormone-related problems. An enlarged amygdala is also linked to the development of bipolar disorder.” (https://www.transformationstreatment.center/treatment/what-happens-to-the-brain-during-depression/)

He had a lot of heartbreaking experiences. And he tells us through his music that while we acknowledge those, these old demons must not rule us or have this power over us. "What didn't kill me only made me stronger...And I begin to bloom like a lotus flower once again..." Like a lotus flower, he bloomed beautifully above the mud and water.

In making music that comforts fans all over the world, idols don’t seem to have anyone to comfort them when it’s their turn to be alone, lonely and tired. #AgustD leaves a message to aspiring artists via #Snooze (ft. Ryuichi Sakamoto & WOOSUNG of The Rose):

“You who sleep for your dreams, it's okay to rest..””

Just laugh out loud

As if the world is leaving

Just hold on

Wherever you are

I hope your dream won't just be left as a dream

I'll cheer you on anytime, anywhere (Dream)…”

“You will fully bloom, after all the hardships

The beginning may be weak, but the end may be great…”

The lyrics of his songs may strike a painful chord, but there is calmness and healing in the end. #DDay reminds us that no matter how ugly some of our memories and past experiences are, liberation is waiting. Beautiful days will come and you will be free…

“The world’s bullshit, but you don’t have to be / So open your eyes and see the real world.”

#DDay is the third #AgustD release, after his self-titled 2016 mixtape and 2020's D-2.

Tracks:

• D-Day
• Haegeum
• HUH?! (ft. j-hope)
• AMYGDALA
• SDL
• People Pt. 2 (ft. IU)
• Polar Night
• Interlude: Dawn
• Snooze (ft. Ryuuichi Sakamoto and WOOSUNG of The Rose)
• Life Goes On

#talesofthegoodgirl #KPam

Call It Love signing off

#CallItLove signing off...

When #HanDongJin and #SimWooJoo showed their smile for the first time, I started to cry nonstop.

Starring #KimYoungKwang and #LeeSungKyung, this slow-burn and sad drama gives off the same vibe as #MyLiberationNotes, #OurBlues and #SummerStrike. Malungkot sobra, malungkot yung characters, malungkot ang mga istorya ng buhay nila. Pero may healing, may consolation, may satisfaction sa end because they deserve to love, be loved and be happy. Hindi minadali, and talagang pinaghintay silang dalawa to be together in the end, na wala nang hindrances. "There's nothing that prohibits you two from being together anymore."

Ngayon lang yata ako nagdasal habang nanunuod ng k-drama na Lord, please give this man a happy ending. Pasayahin Ninyo na po siya. Wag na sana siyang masaktan. Ganern ang effect. Yung mader nya kasi ung original source ng sadness nya. "I'm telling you that I was unhappy, that I've never been happy..."

2nd, yung nagbreak sila ng fiancee niya. I first saw #KimYoungKwang in #OnYourWeddingDay, na pinaiyak din ako ng bonggang-bongga. Iba yung mata niya, yung expressions, yung pagka-slouch, yung likod niya habang naglalakad. Na parang pasan ang buong mundo. And you can see the change nung nainlove siya, parang naiba yung pace ng lakad niya for a while.

I saw #LeeSungKyung naman as female lead in #ShootingStars. Ibang-iba ang character niya dito. Galit sa mundo. Hindi mo masisi because her father cheated on their mother, they got kicked out of their family home, and their lives were never the same again. "You robbed me years of a peaceful and ordinary life. I won't apologize to you, because I am not sorry. But instead I will stop hating and resenting you from today onwards..."

Silang dalawa, pareho silang hindi marunong ngumiti. Kaya nung finally, napangiti na sila, ako naman ang naiyak.

“Pain is all the same. There's no such thing as one that hurts less…”

You can call it anything, but I will still call it love...

Catch #CallItLove at Disney Plus.

Cast:

My Guntang #SungJoon (#Island) who plays #YoonJun, their loyal family friend.

#KimYeWon - WooJoo’s sister #HaeSung

#AhnHeeYeon (#GhostDoctor)

#JangSungBum (#ExtraordinaryAttorneyWoo #SummerStrike #BeyondEvil #AlchemyofSouls)

#KimHeeJung (#StartUp) – gusto ko rin ang character ng madir nila. Cool lang.

#JunSukHo (#MisaengIncompleteLife)

#NamGiAe (#LittleWomen)

#talesofthegoodgirl #KPam

Our Blooming Youth signing off

#OurBloomingYouth signing off...

Romance and mystery, of friendship and love, of betrayal and loyalty - 20 episodes

Thank you #OurBloomingYouth for giving us a happy ending.

#ParkHyungSik at his handsomest, so regal. I really like how his character has evolved. From somewhat an arrogant son of the King, he later on showed his compassionate and gracious side.

Grabe si PHS, parang 24/7 in character – the eyes, yung height, posture, gestures, yung pagka-suplado, parang Prinsipe talaga (#Suits #Happiness #Soundtrack #StrongGirlBongSoon #Hwarang #InTheSoopFriendcation #WoogaSquad) BONUS: The former idol sings a track in this drama’s OST.

#JeonSoNee (#Encounter)

#PyoYeJin (#TaxiDriver #HotelDelLuna #WhatsWrongWithSecretaryKim #WhileYouWereSleeping #FightforMyWay)

#YunJongSeok (#SaveMe #SomethingInTheRain)

#LeeTaeSun (#HotelDelLuna #IDGangnamBeauty #Suits #PrisonPlaybook)

#HeoWonSeo

Catch the drama series at Prime Video PH.

#talesofthegoodgirl #KPam