Re-connecting (through Tales from a Dream)

I have not been blogging for quite sometime now but I just couldn’t resist writing down what I dreamed of last night (this is my first Multiply blog, btw and posted at the same time in The Good Girl's Site).

 

It must be my fascination with MTVs, indie films, reality shows and the like because my dream was like a short fiction turned into a movie (or something like that) because although I was the one dreaming and I was the “leading lady”, I knew that I was “acting” for somebody else, parang pelikula or MTV talaga.

 

Chapter 1. In the beginning (I was in an office set-up), there were around five or six of us around a conference table, the others were seated and I was tidying up the area, collecting file folders. I was standing behind a guy who, from gut feel, was someone special. Uyyyy. I think I was just one of the company trainees (parang bank yung company) and the guy, presumably, was my crush.

 

Fast forward. Setting: still in the office, but it was more like an employee lounge and it was like, after lunchtime, the lights were out and we were resting. Parang boyfriend ko na yung guy kasi we were on the sofa and we were kinda sweet. I know that you must have dreamed something like this before, yung tipong feel na feel mo yung “love” towards the guy you’re with in the dream? But still I knew I wasn’t Pam in the dream. I was somebody else.

 

Fast forward. The boyfriend was telling me some office-related problems and I was trying to comfort him. But I was feeling something else, he was holding back. He was with me but he was distant. All I could do was touch his face and then I turned the other way, trying to control my tears. But I just cried and cried. I was hoping he would ask me why and I would tell him, “It’s because you don’t love me” or “You haven’t told me you love me and yet, we are a couple and I love you so much.” But he didn't say anything. Sobrang pang-Maalaala Mo Kaya, di ba? I remember asking myself in the dream, “Why do you love him so much?” 

 

Fast forward. No more images of the guy. In the dream, I was watching myself in a video or a movie (it was more like a movie epilogue). It showed me as an older woman in corporate attire, telling the viewers what has happened in my life. And I was saying, “Wala na kong balita tungkol kay _________ (name of the guy which by the way I failed to catch, what a laugh!). Meanwhile, head na ako ng Training department (I think this is where I started as a trainee and where I met the guy) and yes, I had many boyfriends here, lahat sila naging boyfriend ko (pointing to men being shown on the movie).”

 

The clincher. As I was watching the movie, I spoke aloud the guy’s name and suddenly, someone behind me asked, “Ako ba?” And yes, just like a fairy tale, there he was. My knight in shining armour, not realizing that all the time, I was still in love with him.

 

Ending. Siyempre naging kami pa din. Happy ending pa din po, di po ba? (Although somewhere, somehow, I had a nagging thought in the dream, “Andyan ka lang pala, sayang naman yung panahon na dapat tayo pa din.”

 

Chuva-choo choo, as Jolens would put it.

 

The End.